Category: aa

“You Called Out For Me And So I Came To You (The Dreamer And The Night Terrors.” Acrylic on canvas. 24in x 24in. Prints available in a variety of sizes.

This will forever be one of my favorite paintings because of who and what it represents. Deanne Hastings was my best friend and muse who tragically went missing at the end of 2015 and has yet to be found. It is suspected that she was murdered, but there has been no closure to date. This painting reflects my first cross-country visit to see Deanne and help her with her recovery after a relapse in Coeur d’Alene. I remember she was having terrible night terrors from the withdrawals  and doing whatever I could to comfort her and just be with her. Whatever she needed from me, I was committed to being there for her and loving her unconditionally. 

Deanne always called me her “Wings” and is the reason I have them tattooed on my back. I just wish I could have there for her this last time when she really needed me most. I could sense the call was going to come, but it never did, and part of me knew why. I’ve always felt that I failed her by not being there that last time, though I wanted to be and would have been. I think one of the reasons I work so hard is because of Deanne. I always tried so hard to impress her and make her proud. The last time I saw her, she told me she was. I will forever do whatever I can to keep her spirit alive through my creations. She is now my “Wings” and my angel. I love you Deanne.

See the full story on Deanne and her disappearance at

“Reconstruction Of the Chimera (Zachericle).” Acrylic, ashes, and cut painting on canvas. Original is 60in x 60in.

“Reconstruction of the Chimera (Zachericle)” tells the story of the mythological phoenix while also incorporating personal narrative elements and concepts of the ouroboros & chimera. Created during my 2012 artist residency, it was inspired by a young man named Zach. Zach would stop by on a daily basis to grab a piece of candy from the bucket I left by the door for those passing by. One day, Zach decided to step in a little further than usual which led to a deeper conversation. I handed Zach a print of my work for stopping by, at which point tears welled up in his eyes. It was at that time that Zach told me he had been living on the street and was just accepted into a program where he would have a bed to sleep for the first time in a long time. My print, he said, was one of the only things in his possession that he could call his own, and the first thing for him to hang above his bed. By the time I finished this painting, Zach had stopped coming by. I don’t believe he ever saw it and hopefully that’s because he’s doing well. Sometimes we just need a chance to start over.

The ashes in this piece are from a painting I burned titled “The Transmutation of Miss-Tere” and the cut fragments are from a piece titled “Sacrifices and Second Chances (The Day Eye Made The Devil Blink).”

You can get prints of this painting at and you can also check out some of my YouTube content showing me sacrificing the painting used to create and give birth to this story.

-Michael Carini

Donate to feed a starving artist and I will send you your favorite #MostlyForHer poem. You can also have it added to a custom painting commission 😘

Missing Wings: The Unfinished Story Of Deanne Hastings:

Michael Carini | LEARN MORE

Over the years I have told a lot of stories through my art but this is by far the most important. Please share this one for Deanne.

Michael Carini | LEARN MORE

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Week, here is a detail of one of my favorite paintings…The Insatiable Monster Eating Away At Me From The Inside. This painting had vodka and xanax mixed with the paint. I love how this detail captured part of the painting in light…and part in shadow.

This painting takes a deep dark journey into personal demons and the things that eat away at the soul. Simultaneously, it reflects upon the simple and pure beauty of the battle back from those deep dark places. Sometimes is may even appear pretty on the outside while crumbling from within. We’ve all seen these places and some of us are still there. Keep fighting.

See the full painting and get prints at

#MostlyForHer 🌹

Make a small donation to feed a starving artist and get your favorite handwritten poem + check out my blog and podcast at 😍
#mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #health #wellness #mindfulness #recovery #scars #healing #quotes #quotesaboutlife #inspirationalquotes #motivationalquotes #travel #traveler #traveling #aa #support #love #goodvibes #hope #positive #truth #raw #real

Michael Carini | LEARN MORE

“As Open Wounds Open Wings”

Growth often requires great struggle and sometimes  great pain. You may have to open yourself up, expose your wounds, and face very real traumas to do so. This may be the tremendously difficult but necessary truth for you to heal and grow your wings. I know it has been for me and, some days, I still feel the wounds opening up. This painting depicts wings sprouting from the wounds of an angel. This could be you. This could be your story. Let your wounds open your wings.

Original available and prints available at + blog and podcast tackling very real issues. I also have a mesmerizing animated version of this painting for you to check out there as well.

Michael Carini | LEARN MORE

Sometimes you have to open yourself up and allow yourself to feel the pain in order to heal. The healing starts from within. Use your pain as a source of strength and open your wings. 

On Easel: When Nobody Else Would Love Me (I Had To Learn To Love Myself)

On Ground: As Open Wounds Open Wings

Both of these paintings are available and prints are currently available for “As Open Wounds Open Wings” at + check out my blog and podcast. 

And the wonderful thing about falling apart is that it gives her the opportunity to stop and pick up all the missing pieces she already has within herself.

Michael Carini | Deanne Hastings

Diving head first into some of my best paintings ever and the muse behind the pain+…Deanne Hastings. This is her story.

If you ever wanted to share one of my stories…this would be the one. Please check out the full blog post and please help bring closure to her story for her friends and family. This is the first time I have ever shared a lot of these stories and who Deanne was to me. The story is 10 years and the making and 4 years later than it should be. I’ve never had difficulty sharing my own stories, but I struggled tremendously to share hers for so many reasons…including having to accept that she’s gone.

Full story HERE

#DeanneHastings #MissingPerson